It seems like a lot of people are using the internet to diagnose themselves. And it’s a great resource - people should have access to information that is relevant to their health. One of the problems with this deluge of information, however, is that it doesn’t take everyone’s personal experience into account. And before you know it, you could have a list of diagnoses that can do more harm than good.
So how can you tell the difference between regular low moods, and chronic depression?
Experiencing low moods is a natural part of life, but when these feelings persist longer than usual, it can impact various aspects of your life. Understanding how depression and prolonged low moods affect you is essential for managing your mental health. How do these feelings influence personal care, friendships, relationships, work life, and overall happiness. What can you do about it to help yourself, and when will seeing a therapist be helpful?
How depression can affect Personal Care
When low moods linger, it can be challenging to take care of yourself. Signs of this might include:
Neglecting Hygiene: You may find it difficult to maintain your daily routine, such as showering, brushing your teeth, or changing clothes.
Imbalanced Eating Habits: You might struggle to feed yourself, binge eat, or lose your appetite, leading to poor nutrition and energy levels.
Changes in sleep patterns. You might be a night owl, or someone who wakes up at 5am on the dot. You might be someone who naturally needs 8 or 9 hours of sleep, or someone who is alert after 4 or 5 hours of sleep. Neither of these is cause for concern. But if you notice a prolonged change in your habits, especially if you’re not feeling rested, that can be one of the first signs of depression.
Therapeutic Tips:
To improve your personal care, the best plan is one that works. If it helps you to create a simple daily routine that includes basic self-care tasks, complete with check marks and times of day, do that. Set reminders on your phone to encourage you to perform these activities. If you know you’re best in the morning, use that time to get other things out of the way, or prep meals ahead of time to make it easier on you at the end of the day. But if your usual tools don’t work, or it lasts longer than a few weeks, consider seeking support.
Depression’s impact on friendships
Low moods can strain your friendships, making it harder to connect with others. You might notice:
Withdrawal: Pulling away from friends and social events, feeling like you don’t have the energy to engage, or that you’re too much of a burden on your friends. And if you’re not eating or sleeping regularly, you may be too tired to show up.
Increased irritability: Prolonged low moods can lead to irritability, making it difficult to maintain positive interactions with friends. There’s a difference between being grumpy and being depressed.
Changes in the way you socialize: We all have the deep friends and the more superficial relationships. We might thrive in a crowd or prefer 1:1 time. But if you notice it’s harder to be honest with people about how you’re really feeling, or you find yourself wanting to only socialize to “escape,” that might be a sign of a deeper change affecting your relationships.
Therapeutic tips:
Make an effort to reach out to friends, even if it feels challenging. Start with a simple text or phone call to check in. Consider scheduling low-pressure activities, like a walk or coffee, where you can catch up without feeling overwhelmed.
Everyone gets grumpy and doesn’t feel up to socializing sometimes. If the usual people or activities can’t cheer you up, there may be a more chronic issue. If you notice that your friendships are suffering significantly and you feel unable to reach out for help, it might be time to talk to a therapist who can help you navigate your feelings.
Depression and Relationships
Your romantic relationships can also be affected by persistent low moods. Signs to look for include:
Emotional Distance or Emotional Reliance. You might feel disconnected from your partner or find it hard to express your feelings. Alternately, you might find it hard to be alone and start feeling clingy. Pay attention to this especially if it’s out of character for you.
Increased Conflict: Low moods can lead to misunderstandings and irritability, causing arguments or tension. We all have fights over small things from time to time. And we can usually repair afterward. But if you notice it’s getting more frequent for you or your loved one, it might be time to say something.
Therapeutic tips:
To strengthen your relationship, practice open communication with your partner about what you’re experiencing. Consider scheduling regular “check-in” times to discuss your feelings and support each other. Engaging in activities together, even simple ones like watching a movie, can help foster connection.
If you notice that your low mood is significantly impacting your relationship, consider couples therapy. A therapist can help both partners understand and manage the emotional challenges you're facing.
Getting to work when you’re depressed
Low moods can spill over into your professional life, affecting your productivity and satisfaction. You might experience:
Decreased motivation: Tasks that once excited you may now feel overwhelming or pointless.
Skipping work: You may find yourself calling in sick more often or avoiding responsibilities altogether.
Fantasizing about a change: If you ordinarily enjoy your work but find yourself dreaming of a 180 degree change in career, it might be a sign that you’re not just having a bad week.
Therapeutic tips:
Set small, achievable goals for your workday to help boost your motivation. Break larger projects into smaller tasks, celebrating each step you complete. Additionally, practice mindfulness techniques, like deep breathing, to help manage stress and improve focus.
If your work performance is suffering and you’re feeling increasingly hopeless, it may be time to speak with a mental health professional who can help you uncover what’s really getting in the way, and guide you through coping strategies to make your next move.
Depression and mood swings
Ultimately, prolonged low moods can lead to a diminished sense of happiness and overall fulfillment. Signs that this may be impacting you include:
Loss of interest in hobbies and activities: Things you once enjoyed may no longer bring you joy.
Persistent negative thoughts: You may find yourself stuck in a cycle of negative thinking, feeling hopeless or helpless.
Therapeutic tips:
To combat feelings of unhappiness, try practicing gratitude daily. Write down three things you’re grateful for each day, no matter how small. This can shift your focus toward positivity. Engaging in activities that promote joy, like listening to music or spending time in nature, can also help.
If feelings of unhappiness persist and you struggle to find joy in anything, consider reaching out to a therapist or psychiatrist. They can help you explore treatment options that may be beneficial.
When low moods last longer than normal, it’s essential to recognize their impact on various aspects of your life. By understanding how these feelings affect personal care, friendships, relationships, work life, and overall happiness, you can take proactive steps to manage your mental health. Remember, it’s okay to seek support when needed. Taking care of your mental well-being is a vital part of living a fulfilling life.
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Read more about therapy for depression here.